do you think I should take out the last verse?

to write is for your life to portray
when your down for the count
why are you here, inside over there
but most of all, your thoughts recount
until when 6 feet deep, you lay

idea inside of thought inside of thoughts
feelings inside of emotions hidden within
the spirit inside of the soul inside of the body
each one another shovel full on the coffin
choice inside of decisions finally all for naught

livin' life fast, never thinking it would end
thought of death hasn't even crossed
as of yet, only age too eager to achieve
only remembered when love was lost
bridges life burned, only for a funeral to mend

  • Author: Amelia Hendricks (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: June 8th, 2023 16:54
  • Comment from author about the poem: Feedback is encouraged, any chance to grow my poetic abilities.
  • Category: Unclassified
  • Views: 5
  • User favorite of this poem: L. B. Mek.
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  • L. B. Mek

    of a poem, in a Poem, within a poem
    that interactive first line works well
    wonderful creativity, thanks for sharing

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