The Lost Soul

I stand in the glow of the full moon light

My body in a constant state of fight or flight

Nobody understands why I want to sever ties

But nobody hears my silent cries

I’m told she wasn’t always this bad

That she wasn’t always this miserable

She wasn’t always this sad

That it happened after you were born

Suddenly I carry all the blame

Am I the one that caused her to go insane?

Why am I such a bad person?

I’m told my father pushed for me to be aborted

And even in life I’m told she wishes she’d had listened

Nobody wants to feel unwanted

But feeling unwanted and knowing you’re unwanted

Are two totally different things

For her I am a constant reminder of her life ruined

I would know because I’m often reminded

But my how the tables turn when I release a new single

Everyone comes by and they finally want to mingle

They tell me of all their wishes and wants

While the memories of hatred they still haunt

I’m finally useful

I’m good for something

I have my looks and I can sing

So now they ask for everything

But even though this is all going on

Deep inside I feel I’m already gone

Died as a child but aged to twenty five

I feel as if I’ve never been alive

Water fills my lungs as if I’m held underwater

I’m drowning and screaming and kicking and screaming

I scream and I scream I want to feel seen

But it’s too late

For far too long this has been my fate