Here I Am

I have been an

Unavoidable, terrifyingly unstable

Mess

I don’t know the words anymore

I don’t know myself anymore

Isn’t it sad?

Isn’t that mad?

I think I’ve gotten swept up

In a whole new realm

And now I’ve gotten lost and

Turned around

And I’m reaching out

To strangers

And they’re saying

I can’t help you

Why should I help you

And now here I am

Typing away,

Using the words in front of me

As a guide of sorts

Hoping that brilliant light

Will flash above me

Because, you see

I’ve consulted the stars

And the moon

And the night

And the daylight

Skies

And they can’t help

They told me themselves

That they can’t help

I can only do that

Myself

So,

Here I am

Hopefully, helping myself

Using the words

Coming out of my hands 

And mouth

To guide myself

Back to who I know I am

Who I think I am

Who I believe I am

Who I hope I still

Am

And, yeah

Maybe it’s been a tough year

Barely kept up with my

Life

So I’m retracing my steps

I’m being blatantly honest

Here

I’m only typing to find myself

Here

In these words

In this…poem of sorts

In my mind

That I think I left behind

Or maybe I lost it

In the wind

So,

Here I am

Once again

Using this poem song

As a light

I think I’ve spent too long

In the dark

So,

Here I am

Once again

Here I am

Here…

I…

Am

…