Somehow

I always see posts

saying “the person who feels like home”

or “you found the one”

and it always

makes me think. 
makes me think too hard. 
I found perfection,

beauty, kindness, love

and somehow

somehow

I still managed to mess it up. 
to lose it, to throw it all away. 
so I’m sat here

looking at pictures and remembering

how it’s my fault

its all gone

im sat here wishing I knew how I fucked it up so badly and lost perfection