The cool breeze
The unparalleled beauty
The sweet sent
That fills my heart
With extreme joy.
So i thought,
Ain't these what we wanted
In life and in heart
Ain't these what we need
To heal our wounds
Ain't these what we got
Gracefully from the God
So why are we,
Destroying and Diminishing
The very beauty that we adore,
The very medicine that heal our hearts
The only gift that God gave to all.
-
Author:
essence of moon (
Offline) - Published: August 21st, 2023 16:22
- Comment from author about the poem: It was written to show the importance of nature, through words. Please give a constructive feedback.
- Category: Nature
- Views: 7
Offline)
Comments1
The planet we live on is truly a gift from God, so why are we destroying it? That's what I got from your poem. It is much too important of a message to use casual language (ain't). ( Perhaps, "Are these not what we wanted?" ) Also you might consider some puntuation and less capitalization. I say these things only for your consideration. After all, the artistic choices are all yours.
I enjoyed your poem, and consider it well expressed as is, but the choice is yours, - Phil A.
To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.