I Forgive You

Why is it that I always give people more chances than I should?

Why do I let it in me up inside while they pretend like we re good?

Why is it that I always hold grudges against myself?

But I have absolutely no problem forgiving everyone else?

I forgive you for constantly allowing people to walk all over you.

I forgive you for always being the one who does so much for others, knowing that it is something that they would never do.

I forgive you for always saying 'yes', when you really wanted to say 'no'.

I forgive you for not being able to pick yourself up when you were feeling low.

For actually believing that for once in your life, someone would save you, because you would do it for them,

For forcing yourself to shut down your feelings, because everyone else would make you feel numb.

For knowing that there was no one else there when you needed someone to answer you pleas,

For taking other people's bullshit for so long and letting them walk all over me.

For thinking that you needed to wait around for someone to finally get their shit together,

And for putting your life aside while the stormed passed, waiting for there to be sunnier weather.

For all of the nights that you thought you were going to end it all for thinking you were always going to be alone,

For not accepting the truth of all the facts that you had already known.

The ones that were staring you in the face the whole time that you kept choosing to ignore,

For sitting there crying at night and hanging by a thread because you couldn't take that pain anymore.

For never believing in your dreams and for always thinking that you were never going to amount to anything,

And for allowing him to treat you like garbage while you continued to treat him like a king.

For pushing the people who mattered away because a few people made it seem like nobody cared,

And for finally accepting the fact that sometimes life isn't fair.

I am finally moving on from the way that everything was supposed to me,

Because the person that I am finally able to forgive is me.