Hazy Memories

Blurs of a white door, so bright and welcoming

Yet I know its only purpose is to deceive with kindness

What lies beyond?

Frankly, I don’t want to know

 

Distant screams

Followed by muffled pleads

She cries for change, yet he stays the same

When has he ever tried to make a difference, anyway?

 

Weary eyes, trembling lips

Stinging tears running down her face

As the bitterness slowly crawls its way down her throat

It’s awfully tragic to stay for the kids, isn’t it?

 

Bruises on her body that put galaxies to shame

Wounds that will never heal and scars that won’t fade

He will never apologize or kiss her fears away

For he would be too forgiving if he even dared

 

The bitter lump lodges itself in the back of her throat

It grows more pungent with every second that passes

As she figures out the truth, he flees the battle ground

He aborts his mission, while her vision finally clears

 

How desperately she wishes she didn’t know anything to begin with

How hopeful she was when she started her journey, wasn't it beautiful?

But now she just wants to leave it all behind

To whisper “Goodbye” and never bat an eye

 

Always trying to put it into perspective, grateful for all that didn’t happen

Yet it doesn’t stop the greed for all that could’ve happened, either

For a life that should’ve been lived

For a family that would’ve been picture-perfect

 

Seeing the world through rose-tinted glass was bound to backfire some day

And when that day came?

The world’s heart grew smaller,

As hers got tinted blue forever

 

Leaving in whispers, amounting to nothing more than a mere shadow for a husband

Coming back home late and the dinner’s gone cold

But don’t worry, darling

His heart froze over long ago, there’s no need to reheat it

 

It’s nothing that she could’ve done that might’ve changed his mind

Or made him think just once

Just this once

For all he’ll lose and all the heartbreak he'll cause

 

Making sense of this hurt

Contemplating every single word exchanged

Trying to make ends meet

Staring at the ceiling while he’s sound asleep

 

The harder she tries, the less he cares

The more she holds on, the more he wants to let go

 

False appearances and tired eyes

Lies hidden under supposed truths

She couldn’t have seen it coming

He didn’t give her a single reason

 

Finally, the unforgiving blow of ultimatum landed

The final choice, yet a new beginning

The epitome of heartbreak, gift-wrapped with a red bow taped on top of it

"It’s you or the kids, darling."