IN AN AWAITED LUSTFALL

Leaned against this mirkened fence
are we found equally bleached, 
beaten by sun, rain and winter cold 

The wait was like cracks around ice-holes, 
in cold, not reliable and in complete inadequacy, 
for the scum’s loopholes, nonsensical sidetracks,
refused me to blossom anew during my withering
It all just carried on, kept creating that ― nothing, 
when all of this suffering bred forth its pitifulness
So, show me a memory freed from complaint here, 
but honourable to my eyes can only Knowledge be

I am the quarry of Life’s faults 
with my pathfound steps

Loved
Always feared

Hated
Always hailed