false prophets

It was so very cold outside snow everywhere, and I was in my room staring outside the window.  My interactions with the monster in my head are growing to be the nightmares I've had where I cannot wake if I do im screaming.

“The snow is everything to me though I wish it would just snow forever…I wish I had ice as magic or some sort of superpower just so it would indeed last forever wherever I go.” I had thought to myself.  I had always been kind of a loser and never was the brightest. Even though my thoughts are strictly fantasy, the monster is real. I swear I've been seeing him on the walls for years now. 

He uses the faces of people I've met, people I've loved. I've grown to hate being alive. My thoughts are sheer violence now, but the snow it keeps me sane.