Poison

You feed me poison
Disguised as a sweet
Lure me out
When I try to retreat

Force the demon out me
When I'm trying to be calm
Because you can't bring yourself

To fuckin think first
Wonder where I get it from

You force feed me
Poison
Tell me it's medicine
It's good for me
It's all I know

Because you're so toxic
You don't notice
Until I fight back

I can only blame myself

You train people
How to treat you
And you trained me
To always be ready for a fight

On the defense
Every time I speak to you
Like a cat on a fence
Ready to pounce
And then you cry
Cuz it's my fault
Every time I speak you
Fuck the words up

I can't speak to you
Because you're always right
Even when I can prove to you
You're not

Call your sister
Call my brother
After every single fuckin fight
So they can know only half the story
So they can know you're right

I know now that
You're poison
All you have is poison
The fuck do I keep comin back for?
Addicted to the
Poison
Well no more

Been tellin myself lies to get through
100% sure I'm only alive because
I learned real early how to
Play pretend
It's the most important game
I ever learned

But now I don't know
What things are real or
Make-believe

I used to tell you
Just exactly what it was
That you wanted to hear
Because the moment I spoke out

A fight starts

Claws out
Get ready for another argument
It doesn't matter what my words meant
How clear I was
How concise or calm
I was
To start
You know exactly what buttons to push

Make me yell
Make me fight
Make me say shit
I don't wanna say
Just to get the fuck back at you
Because you make the demon come out me

I grow horns and spikes and shit
When you push those buttons
I'm sure I'll think of somethin'
You can you to make me into the monster
You want me to be
So you can make everyone else fuckin hate me
Bitch

Spent my life in disassociation
So I could disappear into my own head
And not live here

Make me choke down
Your poison
Make me more hollow

Force me to swallow

Now there's a hole there
I gotta fight to fill
What kinda fuckin mother
Tries to make their kid ill?

Been damn depressed my whole life
Because of this shit
An addiction
You became the source of
Like a vessel
Claiming to be pure
But full of poison

I'm sick of the noise
And
I need to be clear
My life sentence is served
And now it's
To late for the other side

My story's not gunna end
With me dead from
Your poison