The Teenage Dream

Anxiety

An emotion I can never suppress

Just like my shaky hands and the ability to breathe

I'm a mess

Troubled thoughts stampede through my mind

Yet, I never seem to find

The roots to this evil, this sin

Is it because i'm not thin?

Or is it because of my infinite doubts

It clouds my head

my brain like a hurricane

wishing i was dead

Drowning in fear

making my way to the surface, but i'm nowhere near

My mouth begins to fill with ocean and tears

as I try to scream

This is the teenage dream

Depression

Am I sad?

or am I mad?

This is so dumb

I feel everything but yet i'm numb

I stare at my ceiling

wishing I could stop this feeling

I'm just dramatic

Even though i've laid here for so long my legs went static

1000 assignments to get done

but I can barely get myself to look at one

Why do I feel this way?

It truly is such a shame

I'm wasting my life, no meaning to my name

I want to be someone one day

yet when someone asks me

"Are you okay"

I say i'm fine

Even though it's a lie

I lie because I lack the energy to try

Depression is a disease with no cure

no vaccine

I am ill at the ripe age of seventeen

but hey, i'm living the teenage dream

Confidence

Am i pretty?

Am I fat?

This is so silly

These questions, they're just a trap

I drown in the media of what I should be

What others should see

Smile, let's take a picture

My lips form upwards, careful not to show my teeth

The crooked and stained, make me feel hideous underneath

I straighten my posture, lift my chin

And never forget to suck in

Be pretty but act cool

Use your image as a tool

Show the world you're put together

Even though your persona is as fragile as a feather

This has always been society's scheme

Which I call, the teenage dream

Society

The world we live in

is full of despair, betrayal, and sin

With the legislations and laws that the wrong people get to decide

Nowadays it truly is hard to find

Hope

Happiness

Kindness

yet for the american teen

Our number one priority is how we are seen

The pressure and stares

Can easily be mistaken as warfare

The beady eyes like bullets to my head

My brain overcome with grief and dread

I grieve the little girl I use to be

The little girl who use to climb trees

The little girl who wore what she wanted and was free

That little girl, always feared the teenage dream