White Cars

At first it was hard to see them go by,

Because they reminded me of my one and only guy.

The guy who had my heart from the start,

And then the guy who stomped on it and tore it apart.

For years, I would secretly hope that you were the one driving them as they went past,

But just like most things, I realized that this was not going to last.

Because you don’t even live here anymore, so the chance of it being you are slim to none,

And I am learning to accept the fact that you are not the one.

And the cars that used to tear me apart every time I saw them no longer mean the same,

And eventually, I will be able to move past you, and I won’t even remember your name.

I now look at those cars and smile because it shows me how far I have come,

And I no longer need to look at them and feel dumb.

For letting you tear me apart for so long,

And for making me feel like I did everything wrong.

Now I look at them and I am grateful that I will never sit in your passenger seat,

But despite everything, I am happy that we had the privilege to meet.

Because you showed me how true love should never be,

And you showed me that I deserve someone who loves me for me.

And even though letting you go was the hardest part,

Because, as of now, you still have a piece of my heart.

But like everything else, I know that will fade with time,

And one day I will wake up, and I will finally feel fine. 

I will be able to hear your name and smile because the memories no longer bring me pain,

Because over time, my feelings will change, and none of it will be the same.

But I look at the white cars, and with every day, the feelings are starting to fade,

Because instead of looking at the joy of you, I can now look at the mess that you made.

How I tore myself apart trying to be what you wanted,

And now I am just left with the memories that make me feel haunted.

And one day I will be able to look at those white cars and feel absolutely nothing,

And I won’t feel anything, and there will be no pain or joy that it will bring.