Breakable

I cant do this
I want a break
from
all of it
from the world
from the killing people for
just using the bathroom
from smashing someone's skull in
for their identity
from deciding that someone's
life
is worth
less
because they're
"different"
this murder is the last straw
but what can I do but
scream into my fist
but post and hope
someone,
anyone
notices
that a child is dead
that their parents,
their tribe,
their friends,
their community,
has lost someone.

they were
16
now they're dead
killed over a social media argument
murdered and no one did anything
nobody called an ambulance
nobody assessed their wounds
nobody thought that this classified as
a hate crime
that these girls should be arrested
that Nex shouldn't be dead,
shouldn't be making new York post headlines
and articles
misgendering them the whole time
they shouldn't be dead
they shouldn't have been abused and harassed
this should be a bigger deal
this should be in CNN
but it's not
this should be a call to action
but people like me
just sit around and do nothing
and feel hopeless and scared
how can people look at someone and decide that today is the day they are going to slam their head on the bathroom floor
and kill someone
beat them in a bathroom they didnt even
want to be in
a bathroom they were forced into
by Oklahoma laws
what's worse is that
after the school refused to call emergency services,
they proceeded to suspend Nex
for being bullied
for being viciously
beaten,
eventually to death

I can't help but wonder
why Im still alive
while Nex is dead
for the sole reason of just
existing

this "alleged" assault
is all the proof I need
that there is no god
I don't believe that a god would allow
this world
to become this
terrible

I want a break from
all of it