An excerpt from my story Not a Leftover

She drove home. Her heart was still pounding. She would have gone through with it even though she didn’t feel right about it. Victor was probably correct. She would probably regret it and then do it again with others. Guilt would lose its edge, and regret would hide away in the depths of her mind. She’d be numb to everything except being pleasured.

She could see herself in the throes of passion with more than one partner. Eventually, love would find her, surround her, and overtake her. She knew, however, that she’d cheat on the one she loved if she went down the road that she almost went down with Victor. Victor, who had given her a reprieve, allowed her to be a good girl. Her skin crawled as if it were covered by piercing insects. Her knuckles were white from gripping the wheel, and her face was flushed from her own emotions. Was she a good girl? Thoughts swirled like dust devils in her mind. Miri’s brain distracted her at a red light. She was pulled over.

“Ma’am,” said the officer, “you ran a light. Did you realize that?”

Miri answered, “No. I’m sorry. Just write the ticket. I’ve had a bad night.”

Her dress was barely held together with the reattached breast tape. The officer blushed.

He told her, “I’ll let you off with a warning. Go on home and be careful.”

He walked back to his car and got in. His face warm, the memory of Miri and that green revealing dress riding his mind like a tilt-a-whirl.

He thought, “I just wanted to send her home.”

She tossed her dress aside and threw herself into bed only in her underwear. She pulled her cover up over her head and sobbed.  The cover muffled her sounds. She shook like a little girl with a monster under her bed. She choked, threw the cover back, and reached for tissue to spit on her nightstand.

Miri thought, “What a night! I wonder if I’ll ever see Victor again.”

Her face warm, sweat under arms, fluttering in her stomach—maybe she would see Victor on purpose, and she wouldn’t hold back.

“No,” she whispered, “that’s not for me. I’ll call Matt tomorrow and talk to him. I won’t tell him about this episode. There are secrets that must stay secret.”