My Loss

My Loss

I walk through the doors, they are familiar to me

after all I was here yesterday.

But then I was okay, and so was the little one in me.

Today it seems a different business brings us.

Neither one of us seems to be communicating

maybe the machines will help, maybe I can get a message to her.

‘You just need to hang in there a little longer’

that is all the message I have

but she seems to have a different one

‘maybe in another lifetime, maybe in another time,

then we can meet, then we can be.’

But why can I not accept it?

why can I not listen?

I promised to be the best mother

so why can I not accept her message

I held out for long, I wanted her

does it make me a bad mother?

that I don’t want to let go

that I think there is much more

that I want to have a better story

to have more time, for her and me

because I already made a plan.

Your clothes await you

your love is more than enough

so why do I have to let go

when we have come so far

and your arrival was destined for next week!

When did this story we were writing

become an unfamiliar one to you?