a lowercase place

A treasure in my chest with a heart on lock because I threw away the key.

 

I closed both of my eyes when I chunked it so that no one would ever see.

 

That is why I have to tell the whole story so you can see a life for what it’s worth.

 

How a man found happiness within the very poverty he’s been stuck in since birth.

 

Look at our God who is so good that we can gain from a loss and learn from failed test.

 

So for God I will continue to give my all to people by serving his people nothing less.

 

I didn’t believe that what remains of my broken heart could be mended back into one piece.

 

So I financed fake smiles like on a consignment that I can’t afford but God paid the lease.

 

I once had Faith the size of a mustard seed with works that were never sown.

 

Then growth spurts bare fruit from a harvest where nothing has ever grown.

 

A lie came to mind and tried to rob me of the very lesson in which I was taught.

 

To keep me from getting to a lowercase place where God’s grace brought.

 

 

 

 

A road so tough ahead to take each step was a battle me and my leg had fought.

 

To march forward in faith took me to the lowercase place that I never sought.

 

It led me here with you at LCU to read this poem about my journey to happy days.

 

To say never give up if you ever get stuck God can lead you out of that maze.

 

If you keep taking steps through darkness with a sincere love deep in your heart.

 

It’s easy to turn to the wrong direction which only circles right back to the start.

 

God lights up one steppingstone at a time so we don’t get caught up by all that he lays.

 

Distracted by amazement counting steps can take us away from the next phase.

So lost in the darkness because we can never count all of Gods different ways.

 

To get trapped like faith without works is one way that all of this darkness stays.

 

Jesus’ sheep can’t count but they still rest assured knowing God is able to raise.

 

Them up from their very lowest if at their lowest they give God heavenly praise.

 

 

 

 

I learned during my walk with Jesus that I can only be defeated by my own fears.

 

So thankful God loves us makes me have to wipe away all of these happy tears.

 

To get me to step into true faith God went before me to turn bad into a greater good.

 

To know the journey will be rough I would not have taken the road that I should.

 

Because that place looked to difficult for me to make it to this place that I could.

 

By disguising this blessing in my future not wrapped up like a present would.

 

To get me to go where I didn’t want to go God used my tears so I couldn’t see.

 

To walk toward that same place in my life that I always said that I would never be.

 

To search for myself in that dark lonely place that long ago I threw away that key.

 

That heart surgery from God reunited every piece like leaves of my family tree.

New blood flows through an old soul and unlike doctors I was never charged a fee.

 

I prayed to God that if you have to take another coworker then please let it be me.

 

 

 

 

It was from my own self sacrifice that God let me feel again killing my worldly PTSD.

 

I do not write to bring attention to myself or to ask the world to hey look at me.

 

In the road on Cassandra Drive whose curse is said to have caused others to doubt.

 

Just like I doubted myself for 6 months until something came over me on my route.

 

Then I looked up Cassandra which brought clarity to what I’ll call the drought.

 

But that’s another story just like Goliath flexing in the post office looking bad for clout.

 

Believe in the truth that the worst of my losses actually resulted in the greatest of wins.

 

Like how losing my mother when I was 16 changed my path to repent for all of my sins.

 

Which has fueled my passion to go hard and never give anything less than my very best.

  

If you believe and help others know Christ then Christ will deliver you from a worldly mess.

 

This is what my healed heart is pumping blood to my thumbs to type for you and confess.

 

Because by giving your all to glorify God is the only way to be represented by the very best.

 

 

 

 

God is truth that you need to believe and have faith in God and your life he will bless.

 

My words don’t come cheap and I make sure that my actions will make them true.

 

Regardless of what the price is I will never sell my soul despite what I go through.

 

No matter the costs losing my soul is something that I’ll never ever allow myself to do.

 

There are times in life where we can’t continue growing untill we make room for the new.

 

This brought me the change I needed so I could pay homage to the dirt in which I grew.

 

If you give me another minute then I’ll spend another second if you allow me to confess.

 

How I am able to embrace the struggle that took me to a bad place all to find success.

 

And I can’t help that I am who I am but I know this is not the man that I’ll always be.

 

Because everything in this life that I ever got is what the good Lord has given to me.

 

To show how I know that no mistake will ever be to big if we give it to God and we learn.

 

Is how I show you so you know that there isn’t a point from which no man can return.

 

 

 

 

Unless that deception from a fear of a mistake stops us to cause us to miss our last turn.

 

Because when passion that is lost to a fear that we never try leaves a soul to burn.

 

But keep your head up and know that brighter days are coming to light up the night sky.

 

Just know that I fell off so fast I hit the bottom so hard that the Lord used it so I could fly.

 

I know I could never make it back up to the top if God did not push me and have my back.

 

Because I’m to weak and to do it in my own strength revealed how much that I really lack.

 

I hope you don’t bet on my words because words alone come very cheap.

 

But I pray for you that you bet on God and know that in his victory is where you reap.

 

Believe those timeless words of the Bible and feel your heart suddenly start to leak.

 

And all of the blessings will suddenly flow rushing in like rainwater does to a creek.

 

And even though I have overpaid for the words that you may never even hear me speak.

 

I am very blessed to be broke because being broke brought lessons God used to teach.

 

 

 

And if you ever see me by myself then I hope you do know that I am really never truly alone.

 

Because God sent Jesus to guide us all to that heavenly throne where we all seek to belong.

 

So that we will build a great mansion of a house on solid ground for God to make a happy home.

 

That is why this heart here is with Jesus and just to follow him this heart will forever roam.

 

That is why I look a little differently with each step that I choose to take when we walk.

 

That is why I may sound a little different with each of these words that I use for us to talk.

 

This is why I’m confident in my walk with Christ and go to him wherever he may call.

 

Because I know that I’m walking to a better place that is not for me but it is for us all.

 

This is the voice mail that I get from his call when I am not able to make it to the phone.

 

It has paged all of the missing parts from my heart that I thought were forever gone.

 

This is the ringtone that caused me to walk away from a good career to answer this call.

 

It was for God’s mercy on me that I showed mercy to the one wishing for me to fall.

 

 

 

 

It is the path that has led a 40 year old to be a grad student at a Christian school.

 

So that I can learn about God’s word and how to use his Holy Bible like a heavenly tool.

 

It is the reason why when everyone else passes me by like they don’t notice me or even care.

 

I love others like I love myself so I sewed my mended heart back on my sleeve to proudly wear.

 

So do not be fooled by believing a lie that no one cares because I do and want you to succeed.

 

For you can find truth in God’s word that guides us if his word in our heart is what we believe.

 

I will open up that Holy Bible just like I have opened up my heart in every poem that you may read.

 

And close my eyes from the worldly ways so that through this maze I can follow Jesus’s lead.

 

So that I don’t follow the directions of men allowing my faith to lead the way for my mind.

 

So I can act on the instruction of God that always gives instruction at the perfect time.

 

So that I can fly through the time zone of man and then stand synced with Gods clock.

 

Which has allowed me to be able to pass and drive right through that old writer block.

 

 

 

 

Like the ugly duckling I am not a bird of their feather so with or for them I’ll never flock.

 

My foundation is now solid forever but only after I built it on Christ our heavenly rock.

 

I really don’t care that this construction has cost me everything that I had ever got.

 

I feel like I have so much more now with nothing because in Gods nothing there’s a lot.

 

And for his glory for me to stop speaking the truth is something that I will never stop.

 

Just like how in one relationship and out from another one is not a place that I will hop.

 

I’ll go to these lonely places because to those places other conversations have not gone.

 

The truth is not popular because it hurts but it’s in that hard truth where I have grown.

 

My story offers a chance that someone else may learn from it and not mistake the same.

 

I tell it all from the good to the bad for Gods glory I can rejoice when I honor his name.

 

It’s all for the one great I Am which is the greatest name that the world has ever known.

 

Thank you Lord for the bountiful harvest after the storm settled from seeds never sown.

 

Sincerely,

 

Rated2Real

Randall Racine

I pray that my struggle will help another!