Depression and Anxiety

Come on inside

step into my mind

before you jump in fright

and before you go and take flight

let me explain the tangled web

of these feelings that flow and ebb

these feelings are no excuse 

depression's not just a simple case of the blues

a bit of time that's bad

or a season that's unbearably sad

you see, depression is dark grey

a color of living death

the dead skin of a corps

depression is cold 

sharp, heavy and unbearable 

it's from the consistent blues

painted over and over

a poison you drink every day

until you are simply numb to it all

depression isn't always crying

depression is a cold emptiness 

the feeling of dying

that no matter how hard you're trying,

how great your will

that hole won't ever really fill

it always manages to seep in

what it means when you're depressed

is that you're past feeling bad

past feeling sad 

you're simply past feeling

your just painfully numb

those feelings locked in a chest

right next to your heart 

that you'd buried long ago

it's like a light shut off

so you don't see the mess in your room

it's the waking up, counting the hours until you can go back to sleep

it's the unbearable loneliness 

that you've become accustomed to 

the constantly being tired

and feeling scared

the growing voice 

a constant reminder 

that nobody ever really cared

every thought is heavy

and it rests like a blanket

making it hard to get out of bed

and wondering if you'd be better off dead

it's being homesick

inside of your own home

Depression is painfully numb

Anxiety on the other hand

it's not just being fidgety

or a little worried 

it's not being nervous 

it's the constant thinking 

and thinking 

 thinking

sinking

deeper into those thoughts

it's constantly drowning 

with no release 

"oh god why did I do that"

"why did I say that"

"stupid"

"YOU SCREWED IT UP LIKE ALWAYS"

"God you can't do anything right"

anxiety is a bully

always pushing you down

beating you up

making comments about everything you do

your mind becomes a wasps nest

the slightest disturbance setting of the stings

it's being claustrophobic inside your own mind

it's having a billion things to do 

but not knowing what it is you're supposed to.

needing to say a million things

but you don't know what 

and too worried to even open your mouth

having a thousand emotions 

but you can't figure out which one

it's a mouth stitched shut 

keeping you quiet

while the volume of your thoughts turns up

it's pure energy

your mind being electicuted 

and the walls of your mind close into you

Depression is sad 

and anxiety is bad

Depression is when

you don't have the energy

to really care about anything

Anxiety is when

you have too much energy

you care to much

about every single thing

and when you have both 

it's an absolute living hell

it's needing to escape but being too tired to move

being terrified and exhausted at once

not wanting to fail but unable to make the effort

it's caring about everything and then not caring at all

it's freezing and burning

it's wanting to have friends but hating to be social

it's wanting to be alone without being lonely

it's feeling too much and then being numb

it not being able to tell

if you've become void of emotion

or if you've been overwhelmed by all of them

it's depression locking away feelings

and anxiety eating what's left of you