for your ghost

anemoia

I like when you play Pink Floyd

on the TV in your old room

when I lived with you

it was a library

now it takes the appearance

of a machine

 

a maze of plastic green tubes

colors of which are almost complimentary

to your purple spotted skin

room loud with the hum of water

and folding of leather

never enough air

to fill you up completely

 

I would never say it to your face

but there is nothing before you

the first light of life

my first father

 

and last night I saw you crying

clutching mom in the kitchen

hyperventilating without the oxygen to sob

begging from your chair on the floor

for a little more time

you will see no marriage

no grandchildren

no future

 

how friendly Death has become

a neighbor knocking at the door

every few months for a visit

asking if you're ready

dragging at your feet

as you cling

to my little red rocking chair

 

only you keep Jesus alive

a cross burned into my chest

Heaven's gates stay open for you

and I never find myself fully believing

but I'd kneel before anything

to pray, to beg, to forgive

 

I pissed on your carpet

when I was four

I’m sorry

stay

  • Author: anemoia (Offline Offline)
  • Published: April 30th, 2024 23:48
  • Category: Family
  • Views: 4
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