i called an indian call center to complain and the aliens invaded new york

Customer: Hello, is this the phone service center? I’ve got a huge problem with my line!

Call Center Employee: Yes, yes, welcome to the service of phones. How may I assist your calling today?

Customer: It’s my phone service; it’s completely dead. Not a single call is going through!

Call Center Employee: Oh no! Dead you say? We do not want that. Let us resurrect your phone like a phoenix, yes?

Customer: Uh, sure… I just need it fixed ASAP.

Call Center Employee: Of course, of course. Now, tell me, is your phone sleeping? Sometimes they need to wake up.

Customer: No, it’s not sleeping! It’s just not working. No dial tone, nothing!

Call Center Employee: Ah, silent treatment. I understand. Maybe your phone is introvert, yes? Needs space.

Customer: No, man! I think there’s a network issue or something. Can you check?

Call Center Employee: Network… network… Ah! Net and work! Your phone is caught in a net while working?

Customer: What? No! The service, the signal – it’s not there!

Call Center Employee: Signal… Ah! You need signal flare? But please do not set fire to the phone.

Customer: No fires! I’m in New York, and there’s no phone service. Can you get that?

Call Center Employee: New York, big city of dreams! But why you no dream of working phones?

Customer: This is ridiculous. I can’t make calls, I can’t receive calls. It’s like I’m cut off from the world.

Call Center Employee: Cut off… Oh my! Aliens have invaded New York and cut off the phones to isolate you!

Customer: Aliens? What are you talking about?

Call Center Employee: Yes, aliens! I saw in a movie once. They come and first thing they do is cut the phone lines. Very clever, these aliens.

Customer: Listen, there are no aliens. I just want my phone to work. Can you help me or not?

Call Center Employee: I will do the needful, sir. But if you see little green men, you run, okay? Run very fast.

Customer: I don’t believe this… Just fix my phone, please.

Call Center Employee: Do not worry, sir. I will send help. And maybe a message to the aliens – we come in peace!

Customer: Just forget I mentioned aliens. Please, just fix the phone.

Call Center Employee: As you wish, sir. I will fix the phone and protect you from the aliens. Service is our motto!

Customer: Thank you… I guess.

Call Center Employee: You are welcome, sir. Stay safe from the aliens. And remember, if your phone rings and it’s not human, do not answer!

Customer: Goodbye!

Call Center Employee: Goodbye, sir. May the phones be with you!