girl, you can do much more

I guess I failed to conquer your pain.

I guess I could’ve expressed my words better.

I never meant to cause you any harm.

I only wanted the best for the sake of life.

You and me.

For I will never be a saint and I would never say such a thing.

I wish I could’ve erased your thoughts of me.

Cause we are not the same.

We don’t bend light at the same frequencies.

For me it’s neutral green and sage.

For you it’s all red and dark blue.

I hate that you are blinded by hate.

And I thought love kept you in the dark from my mistakes.

And yes, I was mistaken.

It’s you abusing yourself, it’s you hating on your own consciousness.

I never meant to appear heroic.

Selfless or even smarter.

It’s just sometimes people who care for us see us for who we really are.

Instead of a monstrous portrayed image of oneself in said brain.

I never meant to cause you pain.

You have a lot ahead of you, I don’t care if you don’t see it.

It’s not about believing you or not.

It’s about what a potential is and how one shall feed it.

I can see so much in you.

Girl, you can do much more.

Girl, I can see you growing.

Girl, I can see you crawling out of the tomb life’s dug for you.

You just have to stay as strong as you are.

To battle the thoughts, one has.

I can be taken witness for the life I saw in you.

Deep inside of you.

Even if you deny it.

Even if you’re broken just like me.

It doesn’t matter if you can’t see it, it’s true it’s real.

I pray that it’s a matter of time for you to see it.

And you dare to compare.

Me with the reckless youth?

Calling me names hinting cues that I am a liar.

Saying that I am doing all that to just simply, be at rest.

Girl, I could never be at rest.

I am not bad or unwell.

I am just living for the sole purpose of making life happen.

Let’s get it over with.

I don’t care for my own happiness and it’s not selfless.

It just.

Really doesn’t matter.

Anything.

Everything.

I hope I can spark up a light in me, so I’d be able to make it happen.

Make it true.

Loving you.

As you deserve as you are mertiful to receive.

A better version of a man.

A man that I can never be.

It just can never be me.