I Hate You

Out of everyone else, with you it hurts the most,

Because this was the first time in my life where it felt like we were getting close.

As much as I don't want to say those words to you,

It feels like it is the best option after everything you put me through.

When I felt so lost, you gave me back a little bit of hope,

And when I finally opened my heart to you, you chose to let go of the rope.

Just like before, you left me to pick up piece by piece what is left of my heart,

And what hurts the most is I was just finally allowing myself to start.

To start opening up again after being hurt for so long,

To being able to give myself to someone after always being wrong.

To finally believing in love after feeling like someone like me was never going to get it,

Only to find out, that just like the other times, it was another lesson and I just ended up taking a hit.

So here we are, starting again at square one,

And realizing that when it comes to love, I have none.

Just like every other time, it was just another lesson for me to learn,

Unlike the other times, this one is going to leave a scar because of the intensity of the burn.

How stupid of me to think that maybe it would work out my way,

And at this point, there is nothing left for us to say. 

I'll just quietly leave, because I know you don't want me to stay,

And I'll try my best to make it through every day.

Once again, I have to figure out how to move on,

And I wish when you left, the feelings for you were as easily gone.

I will never allow myself to get happy again,

Because I have realized that when it comes, it all seems to abruptly end.