The Final Try

And just like that, we are back to square one,

Trying to pick up the pieces after the damage has already been done.

I guess to you it was all one big joke,

Because I thought you would never leave, and it left me feeling broke.

You gave me hope for the first time in a while,

And you were the one who finally was able to bring back my smile.

Turns out, it was just like every time before,

Because you let me catch feelings, and then told me that you didn’t want anything more.

This time, it is different, because I refuse to let it be the same,

And I am giving up on you, no matter how many times I hear your name.

Someone like you is not worth shit,

And I reduce to let you be the reason that I quit.

Your name was just added to a long list of people who karma is going to get,

And I am not worried about it anymore, because neither you or her is a threat.

You both settled because you weren’t willing to wait to find the one,

And I only give it a few more months before you get bored of having fun.

By the time you come back, it is going to be too late,

Because I am not willing to sit around and wait.

Someone like you is not worth it in the end,

And I don’t want you in my life, as a boyfriend or as a friend.

You are someone who will throw it all away when you think someone better comes along,

But it is so sad to think that you are mistaken and that you’ve got it all wrong.

Never again will anyone have the power to destroy me,

And finally providing myself with that power is what is going to set me free.

For over five years now, I have not been feeling like myself,

And that is all because of the power that I gave to everyone else.

I put others on a pedestal, thinking that was where they all belonged,

Now I see that I was the one who was doing it all wrong.

Everything that I was doing for them, should have been done for me,

And I realize that I don’t need anyone else in my life so I can finally see.

See that I deserve better and I need to give it to myself,

It is time to put everyone else aside, and to stop putting my own needs on a shelf.

It is no longer about waiting for someone to help me through,

Because I know that is something that none of them will ever do.

I know realize that none of you were on my side,

And from this point on, there is nothing left for you to hide.

You true colors came out, and you showed me who you really are,

And I am thankful for every cut, bruise, and scar.

Even though I wear them with pride, I will never show them to you,

Because miserable people like you are proud of everything you put me through.

You show it off to everyone, almost like it is a trophy,

But I have something that you don’t, and that is the power of being me.

There is no one who can bounce back from the hell the way that I can,

And there is no one who remembers the goal, even if they have to stray from the plan.

Reset it a million times because they keep messing up over and over,

But they keep trying everyday, because they know they create their own luck, and can’t rely on a 

four leaf clover.

This time it feels different, because I have nothing to lose,

Because when you hurt me this time, you lit a fuse.

You thought that I would roll over and die,

But at this point, I have no tears left to cry.

The spark in me has blown into a full blown fire,

And I see through all of the games and the liars.

I can’t wait for you to try and sneak back in,

But you’re not welcome, and you will finally see me win.

To everyone who doubted me and thinks that I am not going to succeed,

Thank you for giving me all of the motivation that I need.

In five months, you are going to have to meet me again and figure out who I am,

This time I am doing it for me, and if I hurt some feelings, I don’t give a damn.