Tears

I fight the tears because I fear

I fear you’ll see

I fear I’ll be judged

I fear you’ll ask

I fear you’ll ask about that day

That day I just wasn’t me

The day she left

Left without a word

Without sign

Without a peep

She didn’t bleed but I know she suffered

Finding out oh yes it broke me

Knowing the one who birthed me will be the one I’ll never see

I know she fought for a while but ig her fight was over so you see

She was my mother who I fought to see

Taken by the system forced to be away from the only person I wanted to see

Taken from the one who I loved so deeply

broken by her eyes to the things we couldn’t see

Taken by the system means taken her from me

But soon she would gone for no one to see

I didn’t cry

Cause I guess that just wasn’t me

I was angry

Angry by the fact she didn’t take me

take me so maybe I can see

See why she never listened to me

My unspoken word that could move the sea

But as a child

No I didn’t see

my words are heard but they fade into tears

Tears I can’t hold back when I think of the old me

The me that didn’t have a hole

A hole where she belongs

A hole that you can’t fill as your mother is the only fit so you see

It hurts to think about her cs she’s someone I’ll never see I felt her presence for just a moment then she was taken away from me

I cried when I had the dreamed I just couldn’t believe but  I wish it wasn’t a dream I wish she was her with me so I could really see

See my mother who I once and still fights to see