Double feature

A conversation with myself:

I wish I never met her

What do you mean? I would never say those things

You know it’s true

What’s true?

If we never met her we wouldn’t be in this position

She’s happy though

We could’ve made her happy too

We told her it was us against the world

We promised ourselves to her and look where that lead

I know she still loves us deep down, she told us…

She told us lies, we made them into lies because of our fears

-

It’s another birthday without you.

How are you dear sunshine?

I have people giving me warm wishes, but all I think is how warm my sunshine’s birthday wishes are.

What they were.

Yours were comforting.

Now we act like strangers whenever we see each other.

Does your mom hate me?

She has every right to.

I hate myself too .

I had to let you go, I didn’t feel safe but oh how I miss you so.

My tears fill in the gap you- we made.

Your new friend filled my spot in ur heart.

I need a solution like yours but the idea of replacing you makes me well up and sick with anxiety.