An apology to the one.

Friends whose smiles obscure their worries;
they think I’m strong—a fortress—
but inside crumbles like ash;
their voices pull me from brink to brink.
Yet there’s an ache for release fierce as fire,
temptation veiled in velvet night;
to snuff out this incessant pain—
but who would piece together the shards?
Would they understand this storm within?
The softness in longing for peace stripped bare—
desperate cries drowned by the tumultuous waves;
each ripple pulling further into dark waters.
But you—I see your light piercing through rupture;
your eyes hold galaxies—even when I can’t find ground—
you are my tether amid chaos and fear;
I claw at reasons to stay alive for you alone.
Still... oh how heavy it weighs!
This battle fought by candlelight under murky skies—all alone.;
Can anyone feel this cold grip around breath?
Does anyone see me drown—in silence—or float above it all?
So here I stand—and breathe—for you and her—the future suspended;}=
for every moment stolen brings tenderness near;
with every daylight break promises whispered anew—
yet still there lies a shadow coursing deep.
A strange dance upon razor-thin edges,
torn between presence (barely holding)—
and wishful sighs slipping planets away.
And some days… falling seems like flying to escape---
yet hope glints stronger than darkened wishes.;
For now… I'll thread each word with purpose…
gather warmth from fleeting glances...
illuminate wounds not seen beyond skin…
Love is a flickering ember lingering against dusk;
I'll shield it with frail arms until dawn arrives—
even if steps feel faltering beneath oppressive gloom,
it's enough... somehow—to stay for another tomorrow
whispered into aching night air,
simply because your light waits patiently,
glowing amidst shadows so blue..

*After the hell event that happened I have re-thought things. My bf and I broke up and I went into a rebound relationship and something else happened that I would like to not speak of but the results of what happen may need to involve Children ´ s service.  And so I will be online a lot but I wont be posting guys I am sorry*