love you forever

The clock chimes, a relentless beat,
Another hour, sour and incomplete.
A suitcase phantom in my empty hand,
Searching a promise in this foreign land.

Bright lights blur, a language I can't grasp,
Lost in the chaos, holding breaths that rasp.
From motel doorway to motel's cold gleam,
Haunted by memories, a half-forgotten dream.

Oh, Mama, I crave your gentle touch,
The whispered words, you loved me so much.
The "Everything's Okay," a lullaby of old,
Now echoes silent, a story left untold.

I search and search, a desperate, weary plea,
But at the journey's end, I'm lost at sea.
And then I wake, no suitcase in my grip,
Just emptiness that tears a gaping, silent rip.

Oh, Mama, I wish I knew you deeper, true,
Forgive me all the ways I failed you.
I missed the snuggles, the warmth held tight,
The shelter of your love, burning ever bright.

This world's a puzzle, and I'm a piece astray,
Longing for a haven, where I truly may stay.
Tonight, though, doctors circle, a surgical plea,
Shaping, remaking, what's left of me.

I miss you, Mama, with an aching core,
When will these nightmares cease, and hurt no more?
I search for you, a ghost within my soul,
A wound that time cannot quite make whole.

This heart, it aches with burdens undefined,
A pain that lingers, forever intertwined.
I miss your love, your hugs, your tender grace,
But most of all, I miss your loving face, Mama, your loving face.