Snippets of Haiku
Intensifying feelings
Clear in its structure.
Follows a pattern
Of five, then seven, then five.
Cannot preamble.
It focuses words
Concentrating their choosing.
Therein lies its strength.
EXAMPLE
EMPTINESS
“Silence is golden”
Not when loneliness prevails.
Voices fill a void.
LOST LOVE
Grey eyes , warm with love
Lock with mine across the room.
Our love, our secret.
Summers long hot days
Bring nights of steamy passion.
Skin on skin, slick, wet!
Too late, I missed you.
Not aware how much I cared.
Now I yearn daily.
Jan bach
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Author:
Jan bach (
Offline)
- Published: June 10th, 2025 04:35
- Category: Haiku
- Views: 9
- Users favorite of this poem: sorenbarrett
Comments3
I bow to you in a task of teaching haiku in haiku most masterful. As I have searched in the past there seem many variations such as senryu and the need for a cutting word (kireji) and nature reference (kigo) in the traditional 17 syllable haiku. The difficulty and masterful completion of what you accomplished in this work deserves a fave.
Thank you Sorrenbarret. As someone who naturally would use six words when two would suffice, it makes me concentrate on what I am trying to convey.
This can have a consequence of intensifying emotions I find.
Jan
Thank you for the explanation , can I ask do the full stops and commas count as words??, enjoyed the read
I don't think they do count. I learned about Haiku as being stanzas of 5 stanzas. Then 7 then 5. Don't think punctuation affects it.
Glad you enjoyed it Poetic Licence
Thank you and you are very welcome
An ancient and subtle art that some inspired scribblers confuse with graffiti on a wall !
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