The Big Book of Christmas Mishaps: 13 Wildly Wobbly Verses

(The Silly Little Snowflake)

Oh, I’m a silly snowflake,

I wiggle when I fall,

I bounce off all the rooftops

’Cause I can’t steer at all!

I tried to land on Santa,

But I bonked him on the nose

He sneezed me into orbit

Where I spun like garden hose!

Now I’m zooming past the reindeer,

Doing loop‑de‑loops in space,

Waving at the planets

With my frosty little face!

But when I see the children

Making snowmen down below,

I divebomb like a giggle

And I finally stick the snow!

(The Gingerbread Rebellion)

The gingerbread cookies are staging a coup,

They’re climbing the cupboards and stealing the glue!

They’re riding the spoons like they’re magical sleds,

And wearing the sprinkles like crowns on their heads!

They’re shouting, “No baking! We want a vacation!”

They’re forming a crumbly new cookie‑nation!

But once they get milk and a warm place to sit,

They crumble to giggles and call off the bit.

(Rudolph Lost His GPS)

Rudolph lost his GPS and flew into a tree,

Dasher’s tangled in the branches yelling, “Why’d you follow me?”

Santa’s spinning in a snowdrift like a jolly red balloon

They’re gonna need directions from the Man up on the Moon!

(The Sock That Ate Christmas)

A giant fuzzy Christmas sock escaped the laundry pile,

It gobbled up the ornaments and burped them with a smile.

It swallowed half the presents and the cookies on the tray

But when it tried the fruitcake, it ran screaming far away!

(Santa's Sleigh has Training Wheels)

Santa tried a brand‑new sleigh but couldn’t make it fly,

It wobbled like a shopping cart and bumped into the sky.

The elves slapped on some training wheels and shouted, “Try again!”

Now Santa pedals through the clouds like he’s five years old again.

(Frosty Throws a Tantrum)

Frosty didn’t like his hat, he said it made him itch,

He stomped around the snowy yard and flipped the light‑up switch.

The snowman lights went blinking and the neighbors all woke up

But once he got hot cocoa, he finally shut up.

(Candy Cane Sword Fight)

Two candy canes were arguing about who tasted best,

They crossed themselves like swords and poked each other in the chest.

They clattered on the table till they snapped into a pile

Now they’re peppermint confetti and they’re sticky all the while.

(The Elf Who Wouldn't Go to Bed)

An elf stayed up past bedtime just to finish wrapping toys,

He taped himself to everything and made a lot of noise.

He stuck his hat to Santa’s boot and glued his sleeve to snow

Now he’s the Christmas decoration no one meant to show.

(The Reindeer Who Wanted a Snack Break)

Comet said he’s starving and refused to pull the sleigh,

He plopped down in a snowbank yelling, “Feed me right away!”

They bribed him with a carrot and a bucket full of hay

He trotted off contentedly and saved the holiday.

(The Carolers Who Forgot the Words)

The carolers were singing but they didn’t know the tune,

They hummed and mumbled nonsense underneath the winter moon.

They made up silly lyrics about penguins wearing hats

And somehow everyone agreed it sounded better than the flats.

(The Snowball that Wouldn't Stop Rolling)

A tiny little snowball rolled away from mittened hands,

It gathered up the mailbox and the neighbor’s garbage cans.

It swallowed up a snowman and it gobbled up a tree

Now it’s the jolliest avalanche the town will ever see.

(Mrs. Clause's Cookie Catastrophe)

Mrs. Claus was baking when the oven went kaboom,

The cookies shot like fireworks and bounced around the room.

They ricocheted off candy canes and knocked down Santa’s chair

Now Santa’s wearing frosting like he’s going to the fair.

(The Christmas Tree that Wanted to Dance)

The Christmas tree got restless and began to tap its feet,

It wiggled all its ornaments and shuffled to the beat.

It twirled around the living room and jingled every bell

Then tripped into the eggnog and declared, “I’m doing well!”