I didn't stop because I didn't want him.
I stopped because my knees buckled
at how fast I was falling
and there was no ground in sight.
This wasn't desire.
This was gravity finding me.
I felt myself rearranging;
values loosening,
future bending,
the careful architecture of who I am
starting to crack under the weight of him.
And I knew;
if I let it happen,
there would be no reverse.
No "me" untouched.
No safe version to return to.
So I froze mid-fall.
Do you know what that does to a body?
To stop when every instinct is screaming
to surrender?
I suspended myself
between becoming and disappearing,
muscles burning, lungs locked,
pretending stillness wasn't a choice.
He didn't leave all at once.
He slipped.
Gravity recalimed him.
And now I live
with the phantom sensation;
the constant pull of something
I was never meant to survive resisting.
This isn't heartbreak.
This is structural damage.
Because the worst thing
isn't that I lost him.
It's that my body remembers
exactly how it felt
to almost let go.
And I will never know
if I would have broken-
or finally landed.
-
Author:
nev (
Offline) - Published: January 14th, 2026 11:05
- Comment from author about the poem: There is someone who keeps us questioning. That someone we know we could've had the world with, but we were too scared to take that risk. To let our walls down and to finally live.
- Category: Reflection
- Views: 2
Offline)
Comments1
All those roads we never take and those destinations we will never know, some good and some bad. The unknown it the hardest part. Well done
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