I Wonder...

the essence of a word
an idea, an expanse of something
something I cant quite grasp
I cant quite remember
if it was ever

a truth, an ultimate answer
profound, exquisite, shining bright
and winked out of the now
out into the maybe
maybe never

a truth reconstructed
blemished by constraint
tarnished with harsh existence
a pale reflection in clouded glass

I awake cannot comprehend
understand, articulate
express the core essence
the infinitesimal spark
a scintillating fragment
that tiny piece of broken glass
resting on the ground
sometimes catching sunlight 
reflecting back for an instant
but then disappears

and, I question
I doubt
is this a real truth
or another mind fake
hallucination
rabbit hole
labyrinth of a nothing
that I just wish 
was a reality that had always been hiding
hiding at the back of everything
wanting to be found

I wonder...