Doubts

I am doubting Thomas

I won't fully believe until I touch the wounds

The holes in his hands, 

The gash at his chest

Run my fingers around in the blood and water

See and feel and hear and have no choice but to know

That I am condemned.

I stumble about in this halfway point

Uncertainty at every turn

Unable to embrace the feelings

Of either divine comfort

Or complete freedom

I am fenced in by imaginary parameters

Marred by sins

And chained by lingering faith.