Burden

There's a weight in me that doesn’t have a name

There's a weight in me that doesn’t seem to leave

Yet my chest tightens so much i cant breathe 

Yet my hands shake with no rhyme or reason to believe 

There's a weight in me that doesn’t have a name

This weight drags me down to my bed and makes me late for school

This weight fills my mind with awful thoughts about myself 

This dread in me whispers in my ear saying the same phrase 

Why don't you have the strength to fight for yourself?

There’s a weight in me that i still dont have a name for

This weight comes and go faster than my energy can recharge 

Im a walking spirit with no will or motivation for life

Sometimes i ask myself “what if i follow this thought”

“What if I let it take me, what if i…” 

There is this weight that still lingers within me 

I wait for it to loosen its grip on me

I wait for it to feel lighter

But it never does

In fact, it grows heavier as the days pass

There is this weight that i can no longer name 

I stopped asking what it wants, i stopped arguing back

This weight sits in my chest making it hard to breathe

There’s this weight in me

Yet I've grown too tired to fight back

Maybe this weight is every word i could never say outloud 

I still don't know what this weight is

It brings me to the darkest of thoughts, deep inside my head

Ones i never knew i could think about 

Ones that make it harder as the days go by, year by year

Maybe, maybe this weight is too much

Maybe i should quit right here and now

No one would notice

And to those who would, they would move on

Maybe it's time to let this weight go

Maybe there's no way out anymore

I scream everyday but maybe there is no road

The door in front of me is laid shut

But im to tired to force the knob

I never thought of the perfect name for this weighted object 

This weight that took over my life since day one

This weight that holds me down, not just to my bed but much deeper underground

This weight that not only i hold, but many around me as well 

I was just the first to fall

This weight was never named, and never will

Because anyone who makes it far enough to find its name

Ends up in the same place i sit in still