Loving Beyond Return

What am I supposed to do

when my feelings outweigh every truth I know?

When my heart drags chains through common sense,

pulling me back toward people

who would never bleed the same for me.

I spent so long learning how to care for you

that I forgot how to carry myself.

Set myself aside like an old coat at the door,

useful only when the weather turned cold.

Now I wander through crowded rooms

with hands that still feel empty.

And I wonder,

why loneliness follows me

even when I keep others close enough to hear me breathe.

Why my soul keeps choosing people

who only visit when they need shelter.

Why I cling to echoes

that will never answer back.

The worst part is

I know the questions that matter.

I know the answers too.

But truth is a language

nobody seems to want spoken aloud.

So people soften reality,

bend words into something survivable,

pretend distance is healing,

pretend forgetting is strength.

And maybe lying really is easier,

because honesty means admitting

some things never loved us

the way we loved them.