Sometimes I wonder

Micah Watson

Sometimes I wonder:

 

Dear, I don’t really remember,

 

I know how things ended, and as much as I wish, I’ll never have something that good again. Would I even know if I did?

 

You were my everything, but everything means nothing if it’s constantly changing.

 

Sometimes I wonder, if we hadn’t said the things we did. If I hadn’t taunted the jaws of flames, if I’d just stopped typing,

 

If I hadn’t loved you with such an intensity, with such a feeling, as though my heart was to explode a bloody mess within my rib cage. If I had walked away, sometimes I wonder if it would’ve hurt less, sometimes I wonder if I would’ve cared about you less. But we stopped talking.

 

You blended into a sea of many faces I can no longer remember, you trusted me with such a profusion that you told me stuff I cannot unhear. I think my brain misses you more than my heart does, because I keep seeing you in my dreams.

 

I should’ve just shut my mouth but I have a nagging fear that if I stop talking, I’ll become unimportant and fade into an abyss.

 

Sometimes I wonder if destiny would’ve been nicer to me,

 

Or if it’s all just bullshit.

 

Sometimes I wonder if you loved me the same way as loved you.

 

Yours sincerely,

 

You won’t remember.

Comments +

Comments2

  • sorenbarrett

    Change can be difficult but at the same time like a kaleidoscope it can be engaging and beautiful. A sad write that could be a thing of splendor. Well written

  • Tristan Robert Lange

    Micah, this hit me hard. There is something painfully familiar about looking back and replaying every fork in the road, wondering whether one different choice would have changed everything. I think most of us have visited that place at one time or another. Powerful piece, my friend. 🌹🖤🙏🕯️🐦‍⬛



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