You're the ghost of my past; I allowed myself to be free.

Friendship

You're the ghost of my past; I allowed myself to be free.

For years I searched the shadows of my mind,
Replaying every word, trying to find
The exact moment I caused your pain,
Walking through a self-inflicted rain.
I spent my energy, my youth, my peace,
Begging for a pardon that would never cease,
Believing I was broken, flawed, and cold,
Believing every lie that I was told.

 

It took me time to finally see the light—
To realize I had never lost the fight.
I hadn't hurt you; I had done no wrong.
I’d played the victim in a cruel song
Where the truth was hidden right beneath my nose:
You used me for the comfort of your clothes,
Taking every little piece I had to spare,
Then stripping back the gifts that weren't quite fair,
Reclaiming what you gave, with greedy hands,
Leaving me to sink into your shifting sands.

 

As of yesterday, the chains are snapped in two.
I am done with apologizing to you.
I am living for myself, not for your grace,
No longer running in a pointless race
To soothe a fragile ego built on pride,
With nowhere left for my true self to hide.

 

I don’t care if I offended or upset,
I am wiping clean the ledger of regret.
I will prove to you, with every breath I take,
You’re not worth another tear for old time's sake.
My energy is mine, my spirit strong,
I’ve found the person I was all along—
The one you tried to shatter and destroy,
The one you treated like a passing toy.

 

You lost your grip. The illusion has been undone.
You hold no power now.
I have won.

Comments +

Comments8

  • Thomas W Case

    Excellent

  • sorenbarrett

    A poetic declaration of emancipation from a grip felt too powerful to release. Nicely written in good rhyme and verse with meter and balance. Well done

  • orchidee

    Good write F. Yes, one day I got an old garment (not a new one!) and wrote names on it - things others or I myself degraded myself with; names, comments of shame, blame, derogatory things, etc; then burnt the whole thing in the garden. Therapeutic!

    • Friendship

      Well said, I must try this,Thank you

      • orchidee

        Yes - outdoors - and bucket of water at the ready! lol.

        • Friendship

          Thanks

        • Tony Grannell

          Dear, Friendship,

          This reads like an eureka moment. The realisation of the power of the self, the underdog, as it were, to leading the pack, a pack of energy, spirit, grace and self worth leaving the ghosts in your wake. A beautiful passage of poetry.

          Fond regards,

          Tony.

        • Tristan Robert Lange

          Friendship, the part about apologizing really got to me. I've known people who could make me feel guilty for things I hadn't even done. Eventually, enough is enough! Excellent expression, dear friend.🌹🖤🙏🕯️🐦‍⬛

        • Paul Bell

          Sometimes it takes awhile to realise you've been manipulated.
          Though when the penny drops, it's amazing how quickly that anger can finally break you free.

          • Friendship

            OMG, that's so true, Paul. Thanks for your input.

          • Dan Williams

            What a nice description of a voyage, a struggle. "I don’t care if I offended or upset, I am wiping clean the ledger of regret" is a place I have not gotten to just yet; thank you for marking the path.

          • NafisaSB

            For sure victory is yours and you are well rid of this vicious person



          To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.