Not Enough

My mind is a sick place.

But it's not sick enough.

I have not bled enough to fill a pool.

I have not cried enough to fill an ocean.

I'm not sick enough.

I still have chunks of fat on me,

Not clear-cut bones.

How do I become sick enough?

When I finally feel cold and clammy,

Heart palpitating

And my body crashes onto the floor?

Why am I not sick enough?

Why am I never enough for anything at all.