Sickle Cell Memory

It's in my thoughts

It's in my dreams

What a nightmare 

This isn't fair 

It's slowly eating 

My insides are heating 

My heart violently beating 

The monster inside 

The demons that hide 

Dig into my mind 

The problems I face 

Succeed as I displace 

It's in my heart

It's in my gut 

Filled with muck

I am stuck 

Scraping away my insides 

Ribs caving in 

Blood thickening 

Innocence hides 

Words caving in

Life strickening 

I didn't ask for this 

It passes through me 

I never wanted this 

Bearing the pain to see

I am bursting

Brush my mind 

I suffer the crimes of the blind

I am bruising 

Wash away to bind 

Taking me to be spined 

This was my pride 

So much selfishness 

I am restless 

No joy 

No happiness 

It's in my thoughts

It's in my dreams 

What a nightmare

This isn't fair

This isn't what I had planned 

Fears can't just reverse to be fanned

It's in me 

It's in me 

It's scraping away

It's roaring from the pit of my gut 

Twitching 

Facing my arrest 

Itching 

I am reluctant to be blessed

Stitching 

Piece by piece, horror assessed