The struggle called sleep

PerpetualFlowers

I can't sleep

I'm so tired, panic attacks make me tired

But blissful sleep is elusive

My eyes feel heavy

Yet when they close sleep does not welcome me

On nights when sadness meets me

I stay up worried, crying

Full of anxiety

I start to see dancing shadows

Just my mind playing tricks

This is when I think about dying

I want to sleep, but I stay awake

At those times I want sleep almost as badly

As I want to stay awake on my depressed days

I sleep, always so tired

But I cannot convince my body to wake up

I'm so sad, I drag

I could sleep forever

I don't dream

Except for the nightmares

Oh god the nightmares

My subconscious is just doing it's job

It's what my brain is made of

When I can't sleep I want to

When I can, I don't 

There are times when I sleep 8 hours

I wake up and I can get dressed

I can go to school

I can be normal

I wish every day was a good day

People take sleep for granted

 I'm either sleep deprived

Or I sleep just to stay alive

Because maybe if I was awake

I'd commit suicide

I just want to be happy,normal, and free

Free from my mind

Free from my body

Free from me

 

  • Author: ~xx (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: April 11th, 2016 18:14
  • Comment from author about the poem: It's a constant battle man.
  • Category: Unclassified
  • Views: 25
  • Users favorite of this poem: Tyrell_Jordan, Izzi Lynn, AlitaOpal.
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Comments2

  • Severus Alexander

    Touching!

    Freedom has its perks, but it also carries a great deal of responsibility...

    But, you know, its freedom, and that goes a long way. : )

  • AlitaOpal

    I love this poem so much!
    How are you describing the way I've been feeling..
    Both literally and metaphorically I resonate with this..
    Thank you so much..
    Really emotional right now..

    • PerpetualFlowers

      I apologize for not replying earlier but thank you so much.

      • AlitaOpal

        Always welcome 🌹



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