Myself

The mess is finally being sorted out

I am finally getting back into my groove 

I was in such a rut that I would just lay here on my mattress tied into serpentine knots, unable to move 

Only think

And worry 

And remember 

And cry

Why it all came closing down and sent me skyward was all just part of the plan for me

I know now that my reward lies up ahead in the near future, which is already right now

When it all comes clear to you, I can't really even explain how it is, but you just know and it's a feeling that is almost unreal

Coyote Spirit, please do not bring your trickster ways into this painting, I beg of you

I tried to intertwine with you that day in April, or was it May?

But, of course the human animals all followed me toward you like you were part of a fucking petting zoo

I made certain of your escape before I left you

So, I know you won't come here to trick me

I won't let go from my embrace upon my future and all of my plans

I will not lose sight of all the clairvoyant images that captivate my deepest dreams

No matter what obstacles end up falling across my pathway, I will climb over them

Kick them to pieces

Blow them the fuck out of my way with the dragons fire that is my breath

If I'm hungry, I will eat them and shit them out so that the ravens can fill their bellies as they follow close behind me via the command of all the twisted, desperate hags

Hell, I'll even give each one them name tags so that we will all be on the same sordid page

I will not succumb to their envy that has forever caused my heart to bleed, my mind to rage

I am so fed up with everyone else's mindless chatter

Their bitching and belly-aching over everything under the blessed Sun

Sick of listening to so many ingrates who are supposedly in love fighting constantly under the continuity of their days spent spun out of their own self-control

I am not going to hide out in retreat in this hole anymore

Get outta my sight, my sound, my way

I'll show you all the door myself

I'll go ahead and take all that you all take for granted away from you and keep it all for myself

Make you all see how ignorant and blind you are and always will be

Take a look at this bitch

I am free from all that you stand for now

Nothing can stop me

Not even myself

7-18-2016