Doing Just Fine

I was doing just fine,
I waltzed into school
With a smile on my face
And stories to tell you about.

Lessons passed and I was happy, I was good,
I sat an exam with confidence,
I sat my lessons with hand raised and
complex answers being said.

Then, I wasn't doing fine 
My heart was racing.
My head was jumbled.
Myself could no longer take this.

Now, I am not fine
I could cry.
I could scream.
I will compress it.

I will tell you I am fine
But the word fine has two meanings:
Of very high quality; very good of its kind.
Or, very thin or narrow.

I pick the latter.

For I am not fine.

And I will spit this word with venom.
For I am not fine and I feel like I will
Never be fine again.