Egyptian Gold

Strangers have appeared here and there over the past year or so

In the midst of my work day 

While out running errands at some random place

From out of nowhere 

Two feet away from my face

They keep telling me that my struggles are soon to be over

That my entire world is on the verge of being turned upside down 

That one day I will never need to fret over matters of money ever again 

Even just recently

In a fortune cookie handed to me by the owner of a family-owned restaurant where I frequently eat my lunch 

The next time I visited her, she ran after me when I  was headed back to work to hand me a handmade calender for the upcoming Chinese  New Year

The messages from a vast variety of resources have all been, essentially, the same

So,  you can bet your asses that I have been playing the game even harder than I ever have before 

I sort of wish that these prophets would stop tantalizing me verbally with an invisible future

I wish they would just take my hand  and lead me to the face of this door that I must open faithfully

Or give me some more details,  at least

If I can make myself aware of the fact that nothing fails, then it won't be possible for me to ever find myself feeling disappointed, upset, or ashamed

This animal within me cannot be tamed 

It attacks everything in its wake with razor talons and iron fists

I wish it could be beckoned to move backwards sometimes 

To stalk and devour all of the fools who's backsides I have already kissed just to have the strength to carry on

Even though troubled times are over and gone, the idea of turning them into their own  boomerangs is one that I still hold in the highest regard

I have not given my future much respect for way too long now

Instead of actually painting the picture, I just let the brushes drop and flow freely while my mind takes me to a realm that leaves my temple slight of hands

Wherever life lands me, I will make my way without complaint 

I often wish I were in control of the pieces of me that are held down in ethereal restraint 

The fragments within my soul that I doubt I will ever get to know

The pieces of shit that I have appointed to be my fertilizer that have chosen instead to not help me grow 

I guess nobody is meant to be perfect 

We were never supposed to know it all

But, Natures' call keeps me trying to anyway 

No matter where I go or what I do, I always find a lining that is rich like Egyptian gold 

The silver ones I saw before I came back to life through the miracle of birth 

Unto this Earth, I am again reborn 

Sworn to remain relentless forever

Every moment, an over-achiever

All of these prophets have made me a true believer once again 

I can feel the signs of tomorrow 

I already know what it feels like to be draped in Egyptian gold... 

11/17/2016