Reasons

Reasons

There's always a reason for whatever this life throws our way
An existence is what we all are just surviving from day to day
Sometimes the road will be rocky an sometimes it being so smooth
Survival being the hardest part something we all individually prove

Loosing someone so close whom I adored how it breaks my heart
Having no reason to take my dad away from me from the very start
Been really hard for me to understand though it's probably for the best
Sheer gut wrenching pain, hurt and anger this it being my ultimate test

I lost all sense of caring anymore I just wanted to be left alone
I've cried so much and prayed somehow you'd be sitting at home
I stand inside your shed looking around at what I'd call your shrine
There I feel as if your with me, I cry wishing we had loads more time

Hope that you can forgive me Dad for not being there when you died
I couldn't do it, Dad just sitting waiting to be told was hard to abide
You know me too well, I didn't know what I'd do I was so scared
You knowing how much I loved you, I knowing how much you cared

I can't believe I haven't seen or spoken to you in almost a full year
Missing you so much my heart being crushed still I shed another tear
I sit at your grave arranging your roses, sometimes talking to you
I can't remember what I've said just memories and being so sad too

I'll be standing at your grave on the first anniversary of your death
Laying down the families flowers and as I leave you my Dad wreath
Tears of sadness not believing you have died how my heart is aching
I'll always wonder who it was who chose you and why your were taken

I love you with all my heart
Caroline
xxx