Dear Hannah

Dear Hannah, 

 

For a while now you have loved him, 

over a whole year filled with ups and downs,

the first boy that kissed every inch of your tender body

the one that made you feel at most alive in moments of fear.

 

I wish I could apologize to you, 

but Hannah even if I had the chance, I wouldn't. 

I don't aspire to sound as the horrible person you probably think I am, 

but I genuinely wouldn't change anything that has happened, 

and for that I am sorry.

Maybe I am that awful human being.

 

I know what I did was wrong, 

but for me it wasn't about the high it gave me,

it was about the love he gave me. 

I wish you'd understand it just wasn't about you. 

 

You couldn't have changed his feelings for me, 

You couldn't have changed his disgusting manner, 

You couldn't have changed the fact that I was still in love with him.

It wasn't your fault, there was absolutely nothing you could have done. 

 

I wish he treated you different, 

You deserve someone so much greater than him. 

You deserve the world, Hannah, 

You really do. 

 

Now, I do not know you, 

you will never read this poem, 

and no matter what I can say,

I cannot change the pain you are going through.

 

Hate me, Hannah,

hate me,

hate him,

don't you dare hate yourself.

 

I wish I could tell you it didn't mean anything, 

I wish I could tell you he meant nothing, 

I wish he could tell you there was never something going on, 

but Hannah I have questions.

 

Have you never went on his phone,

to see my number and social media? 

Have you never realized why he didn't care, 

when you didn't want any more?

Have you never asked yourself why he was acting different,

guilty perhaps? 

Not to be abrupt, but how did you not know?

 

I think you have known all along, 

maybe not to the extent or with whom, 

but 

how did you not know? 

 

I won't say I'm sorry,

because as I stated before, 

I'm not.

 

But I will say, 

I'm sorry he didn't love you enough.

I'm sorry he couldn't give you more.

I'm sorry he gave into bad decisions.

I wish you nothing,

but love in your future.

 

-the other woman