Tumor

Here I am again.
Back in the darkness where the worms are more natural than induced.
My infection spreads like a silent predator hiding in plain sight, hunting the light and devouring the happiness of the ones I love the most. 
I can't see until the resentment and hatred are too great to heal.
It's too late.
I begin to feel the emptiness as I watch myself let true beauty and love so pure and powerful die a long and painful death. 
It reaches for me.
Pleading for my hand.
Screaming for my help.
I just stand there silent, lifeless, blind, and deaf pushing it further forward into death while thinking that I'm pulling it closer to a spark that is just another vile illusion. 
Then silence.
A silence so deafening that it pierces my heart like a long serrated blade plunging slowly as if to ensure that every possible second of pain will not be eluded.
Through my tears, I struggle to see.
Then I do.
Knuckles white from the locked grip my fingers hold on the hilt.
I AM the infection.
I AM the cancerous filth.
Even in this horrid realization.... I remain selfish as I look on the long trail of misery I leave in my wake.