The Letter

Dear future daughter,

Listen to the words of your future mother. Know that I don't know everything but I can tell you what I know. I can tell you how niggas ain't shit and they think you always need some dick. I can tell you how love doesn't pay bills and love won't keep you warm at night. Love don't cost a thing but love won't do you right. Love ain't love if you don't know how to love yourself. I can tell you how my first love up and left and he never came back. He was my future every thing and that was that. Along down the road where I met my future maybes and the why the hell was I so crazy. The what the fuck was I thinking. The love has me so blind. The ooh lawd you so fine and lastly the stop wasting my damn time. I can tell you how everyone ain't the same. One thing is for sure the game never changes. The pickup lines get nicer and the boys come wiser. Dear future daughter...I don't know how to tell you this but I grew up without a father and sadly you might too because I can't find a decent man to look after me or you. Daddy wanted to play games. Daddy thought I tried to trap him. Daddy wanted to abort you because you were just a mistake that took place on that day at his place. Daddy didn't want you here because he was young and so was i. Daddy didn't have a job and mommy didn't either. He wanted to say goodbye to you forever. Daddy didn't want a little princess, daddy wanted to kick it with bitches and hoes who were priceless. He didn't want a family, he wanted a quickie in the backseat. Dear future daughter when times get hard I would have been right here to hold you. Sorry that you're not here. I shouldn't have listened. I shouldn't have gone to the clinic. I shouldn't have signed my name on the dotted line giving them permission to take the piece of me that was already missing. Giving them the ready..set..go..to send you back to your heavenly Father. He created you for me and I sent you back in peace. I needed you here, but mommy was only 17. Mommy could hardly take care of herself. Mommy could barely wake up every morning and look at her self. Im sorry that I wasn't ready. Im sorry that you was just a quickie. Im sorry that you couldn't be here with me. Sorry that daddy wanted to abort. Sorry that I listened to that stupid choice. I sent you back in peace and maybe next time you will be ready for me...like I will be ready for you. Dear future daughter sorry to be telling you this through a letter....never had the chance to tell you face to face so I thought this would be better.