A Broken Promise

The moment that we said Goodbye is the moment I died, 

Like cold water thrown on me and shivered with my thin body,

I want to scream, scream and ask you why? 

What brought us up to this moment of unbearable sigh

I want to hug and kiss you that moment, fix everything and blame all to myself. 

Maybe it is me that pushed you away, maybe it’s my stubbornness that led to stray

I cried and cried for weeks and went to seek help 

Went to mental health and look for solutions for this loss that I felt 

You see they told that I have a choice but I don’t have really a choice, 

How could I give up and quit my job, for I sworn in as an Air Force

It is already hard enough that I am old when I started to serve

And thought you would understand thats why we took the next step and hurried and get married

I tried to understand the differences and tried to hold on to you

With all my heart even it hurts I will still give all this things for us two

But then you decided this is not the life for you and you decided the easy way out

You decided to move on with your life without me, now all i have is doubt 

It hurts, it hurts so bad because I feel broken as fuck and this tore me apart

I do not know how or when to start or where my life should be 

Suddenly I lost my focus and lost my sense of self, lost it all for someone like you

I love you and I miss you but how could I still feel this feelings of blues

Something died in me and something or somehow, oh please give me a remedy

This person took it all and took it all away from me

With no second thoughts, he forgot all his promises that no matter what Team JC

Now, I feel like an addict craving for crumbs of his love like scarcity 

Look at me, please look at me! a broken soldier with a broken heart 

Suddenly lost the sense to serve her own self and don’t know where to start

All I know is that I got cheated with a wonderful feeling that everyone called “Love”!

I feel so abandoned, hopeless, ashamed and now discard.