god as a woman

you willingly subscribe

to the belief of a god that

encourages you in

and then rewards you for

condemning those that

are seen as other

or different than yourself

but that is not what

the true meaning of this

so called good book

is calling upon you to do

but still you do

picketing funerals of gay people

wishing death upon those

that are of different abilities and minds

and willfully supporting conversion therapy

as if there is enough electricity in this world

to make me stop loving men and women

and this god

this vision of a man

with white skin and long brown hair

but not enough length to make him seem feminine

with his flat stomach and the

fabricated willingness to absolve

us of all our sins

by, ironically enough, being murdered

he still does not scare me

no, what scares me

is what you do in the name of your god

what you believe him to be saying

that because i am a trans man

because i am queer

because i tried to kill myself

i am going to hell

but doing this

using your god

a man proven time and again

to be of middle eastern descent

with an unwed virgin mother

and two fathers

as an excuse to incite violence

upon others

how does that not make you

ask yourself if this is what

he really would have wanted?

but when you can

take this person and raise them upon

a pedestal that forgives you of your hate

what does it matter

what they really said

what they really believed

and that they loved all equally?

this probably has something to do

with why i like to see jesus as a woman

sometimes a trans woman

but mostly because women are

of a gentler human variety

a nurturing sort

inhabiting the universal image

of a mother

and i know that this

god, maybe the one that

i pray to when i don’t know

what else to do

i know that she loves me

despite everything i have done

to others and to myself

she loves me

she loves me

she loves me