When you treat your depression like a monster for so long
You forget it's a part of you
And in your attempt to kill what has now become yourself
You end up living like you deserve to be destroyed
I'm not scared of the monsters in my closet or under my bed
The ones to be afraid of are in my head
Even when I hide underneath my blanket they still whisper at me
Telling me my self-worth
Telling me who to be
They don't care how many times I beg for purgatory
Or to be washed clean
The only place I'm safe is in my dreams
My worst nightmare is reality
Dealing with anxiety
Everyday a new panic attack
Something to be afraid of
I’m not scared of the dark
Or a broken heart
I'm not scared of getting old
I'm scared of turning cold
Being left behind in this nightmare of mine
People tell me crazy
That I've gone off the deep end
How many times do I have to mention drowning before I can just get some sleep in?
I've named my monsters
Travesty, Tragedy
Depression & Anxiety
They scare me
But in my dreams
They're the only ones that understand me
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Author:
ummbree (
Offline) - Published: August 22nd, 2017 18:56
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 15
Offline)
Comments3
"I'm not scared of getting old
I'm scared of turning cold"
Yes, it is the 'cold' that horrified me. Depression, no way to exit.
Very well expressed.
Thank you so much!
Nice. I like this
I'm glad!
Beautifully written, ummbree! You turned this nightmare into a beautiful, though hard hitting poem. What I see in your writing is a strong, determined soul, who is not scared of anything. The monsters are there, yes, but you named them, thereby containing them. Nothing to be scared of, you are on your way to winning!
This means so much! I appreciate the feedback!
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