nunyabeeznaz

MY ROAD TO NOWHERE

WHEN I WAS LITTLE, THE SUN WAS SO BRIGHT

NEVER FELT THE DARKNESS, NO DESPAIR IN SIGHT

SOME YEARS WENT BY, I FOUND OUT I WAS SMART

LOVED BEING ALIVE, AND HAD A GIANT HEART

A FEW MORE WENT BY, THINGS STARTED TO CHANGE

SEEMED ALL MY ASPIRATIONS, WERE OUT OF MY RANGE

I REACHED OUT MY HAND, TO SO MANY FOLKS

BUT TO THEM ALL MY EFFORTS, WERE SIMPLY A JOKE

SO I TRADED MY SUNSHINE, IN FOR A HIGH

GAVE UP ON HUMANITY, AND STARTED TO CRY

MORE YEARS WENT BY, I CAN HARDLY REMEMBER

MONTHS CHANGED WITHOUT PAUSE, JANUARY TO DECEMBER

TEMPTING DEATH EVERY DAY, WITHOUT HESITATION

WANTING THE DARKNESS, AS MY DESTINATION

THEN WHEN ALL WAS LOST, AND MY TEARS TURNED TO RAGE

LIFE HAD ANOTHER CHAPTER, SO I TURNED THE PAGE

I FOUND SOMEBODY, WHO SEEMED TO HAVE MY BACK

THE LOYALTY MY LIFE, HAD ALWAYS SEEMED TO LACK

THE SUNSHINE RETURNED, I WAS A NEW MAN

I FINALLY HAD A LEG, UPON WHICH I COULD STAND

SOMEONE WHO GAVE ME HOPE, AND SAID I WAS WANTED

WHEN EVERYONE ELSE, HAD JUST USED ME OR TAUNTED

A GIFT WITH NO PRICETAG, NO MANNER OF DEBT

AS GOOD OF A DEAL, AS SOMEONE COULD GET

YET MORE YEARS, PASSED RIGHT ON BY

FORGETTING ALL THE DAYS, I USED TO JUST CRY

A WALL HAD BUILT UP, TO PROTECT FROM THE BAD

A WALL THROUGH WHICH, NO PAIN COULD BE HAD

SEEMED LIFE HAD A NOTHER CHAPTER, YET TO BE WRIT

ID SURVIVED THROUGH IT ALL, SO I COULD LIVE IT

SO MANY CAME AND WENT, BUT SHE WAS STILL THERE

TOGETHER AS ONE, NOT JUST A PAIR

AND THOUGH LIFE THREW DISEASE, INTO MY WAY

MY WILL TO LIVE, NEVER DID SWAY

I HAD ALL I WANTED, WITH KIDS NOW IN TOW

NOW TO MAKE SURE I WAS THERE, TO WITNESS THEM GROW

NOT THAT THEIR DAD, WAS SOMEONE OF WHICH TO BE PROUD 

BUT I STILL YELLED EVERY DAY, THAT I LOVED THEM OUT LOUD

AND SO I FEEL THE SUN SETTING, AS THE DARKNESS RETURNS

SEEMS AFTER IT ALL, I HAVE THE SAME YEARNS

AS EVERYTHING AROUND ME, RETURNS TO ITS SLIDE

AT LEAST NOW I KNOW, I WAS THERE FOR THE RIDE

 

IVE HAD IT ALL, HAPPINESS ANGER AND DESPAIR

SEEMS SUCH A WASTE, ON A ROAD TO NOWHERE

I REALLY HAD PLANNED, ON BEING AN OLD MAN

BUT APPEARS TO ME NOW, THAT ISNT LIFES PLAN

I TRY EVERY DAY, TO GET UP AND STAND

BUT HARD TO DO, WHEN LIVING ON SAND

WHEN YOURE EVERYONES DOORMAT, THE JOB HAS NO PERKS

BUT YOU SURE DO GET TIRED, OF BOWING TO JERKS

ITS HARDER TO BE GOOD, AND DO THE RIGHT THING

TO STOP AND JUST LISTEN, TO HOW THE BIRDS SING

SO EASY TO SURRENDER, WHEN THE ODDS ALL SEEM STACKED

HARDER THAN EVER, TO GET YOUR JOY BACK

TAKING ONE STEP FORWARD, THEN GETTING KNOCKED BACK TWO

BUT AT SOME POINT, YOU DO IT FOR YOU

 

I LOOK IN THE MIRROR, AND SOMEONE LOOKS BACK

BUT ITS NOT WHO I RECOGNIZE, THE IMAGE TURNS BLACK

THE DEMONS DEFEATED, WERE JUST LAYING IN WAIT

WAITING TO UNLEASH, THEIR VISIONS OF HATE

BUT WHEN HATE CONSUMES, YOUR EVERY BREATH

THE ONLY ENDING IN SIGHT, IS YOUR OWN DEATH

TO RETURN TO THE LIGHT, I NEED SOME DIRECTION

I REFUSE TO BE, PART OF THE DARKNESS' COLLECTION

WITH NO ALLIES IN SIGHT, ITS NO EASY CHORE

BUT I TELL MYSELF HOW, IVE DONE THIS BEFORE

I GAVE UP BACK THEN, BUT DEATH DIDNT WANT ME

I DO WHAT I CAN , WHILE THE FAILURE STILL HAUNTS ME 

I NEVER SURRENDER, BUT THE FIGHT MAKES ME SO TIRED

THE WAR WILL RAGE ON, UNTIL IVE EXPIRED

PEOPLE ARENT TO BE TRUSTED, ALL THEIR SOULS BLACK

JUST WAITING FOR THE INSERTION, OF THE KNIFE IN MY BACK

I TELL MYSELF, DONT TRUST ANYBODY

DOING MY BEST, NOT TO GET MY HANDS BLOODY

BUT NICENESS PROJECTS WEAKNESS, TO THOSE WHO YOU TRUST

EVERY EFFORT YOU MAKE, ENDS UP A BUST

SEEMS LIKE SUCH EASY, ADVICE TO FOLLOW

WHEN YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEAD, ALL PROMISES HOLLOW

THE HEART DOESNT ALWAYS, LIKE TO FOLLOW YOUR PLAN

SO INSTEAD YOU JUST DO, THE BEST THAT YOU CAN

GIVE IT ALL YOU HAVE, THROUGH THE EXHAUSTION

DOING YOUR BEST, TO PROCEED WITH CAUTION

BUT IF YOU SPEND YOUR LIFE HATING, ALL THAT YOU KNOW

REALLY LEAVES NOWHERE, FOR THE HEART TO GO

DONT FOLLOW YOUR EMOTIONS, ALWAYS YOUR BRAIN

LEADS YOU TO BE LONELY, BUT AVOIDS ALL THE PAIN

SUCH EASY ADVICE, TO SAY WITH YOUR MOUTH

BUT LOVING SOMEONE, SENDS THAT PLAN SOUTH

 

SO YOU WALK INTO BATTLE, WITH NO WEAPON TO USE

KNOWING THERES NO OPTION, OTHER THAN TO LOSE

BUT LIKE HISTORY, TO US ALL HAS TAUGHT

A LIFE WITHOUT PURPOSE, IS ALL FOR NAUGHT

SO EVEN IN THE FACE, OF CERTAIN DEFEAT

YOU REFUSED TO BE KNOCKED, OFF OF YOUR FEET

EVEN IF YOU FEEL, DEATH WONT BE LONG

IF YOU REFUSE TO ACCEPT IT, YOU HAVE TO BE STRONG

THE HILL IS SO STEEP, YOU CONSTANTLY FALL

YOU CAN SEE THE TOP, THOUGH THE LIGHT SEEMS SO SMALL

AND JUST AS YOU SEE, THAT YOURE ALMOST THERE

YOU REALIZE UP THIS FAR, YOU CANT BREATH THE AIR

AND AS YOU FEEL, YOUR LIFE START TO SUBSIDE

YOU REALIZE YOUR ENEMY, COMES FROM INSIDE

SEEMS OTHERS ARENT THE DEMONS, WHOM WHICH YOU HAVE FEARED

THOUGH NOW ITS TOO LATE, YOUR CONSCIENCE IS CLEARED

EVEN WITHOUT BREATH, YOU START TO FEEL PEACE

EVEN AS ORGAN FUNCTION, AND BRAINPOWER CEASE

YOU KNOW THIS IS IT, IT ALL STARTS TO GO BLANK

BUT IF YOU HAD NO CAUSE, YOUD HAVE NOBODY TO THANK

YOU SPENT YOUR LIFE CLIMBING, FOR WHAT YOU KNOW NOT

BUT HOPING FOR SOMETHING, IS ALL THAT YOUVE GOT

SCIENCE TEACHES, BLIEVE WHAT IS THERE

EVEN WHEN LIFE, RARELY SEEMS FAIR

JOAN OF ARC FREED A COUNTRY, BELIEVING IT WAS FATE 

EVEN WHEN TORTURED, SHE WAS EMPTY OF HATE

WHILE RELIGION ISNT ALWAYS, A FRIEND TO THE SANE

THE SOLID WILL TO WIN, SHOULD ALWAYS BE PLAIN

 

NOW LIFELESS ON TOP, THIS IS YOUR WIN

WITH NOTHING TO SHOW, BUT SCARS ON YOUR SKIN

THE WOUNDS SELF INFLICTED, NOT FROM THOSE YOU LET CLOSE

THIS ISNT THE ENDING, YOUD LIKE TO HAVE CHOSE

WHILE TRUE YOU CANT TRUST, ALL WHO YOU KNOW

THERE IS SOMEONE THERE, IF YOU CAN FIND WHERE TO GO

 

 

 

Comments2

  • mocuisle

    Great write

    • nunyabeeznaz

      thanks for suffering through its length. i made title at last second if you have better idea or any criticisms in general id love to hear it

    • mocuisle

      I wouldn't look at it as a road to nowhere, you had good times and bad times but over all that happened you carried the memories and the love for your children to the end , and the bad and the good sculpt you into a better person , it's what makes you , you. Look how much you've grown as a person , it wasn't the road to nowhere

      • nunyabeeznaz

        you have a better idea for the title? totally open for a suggestion and totally appreciate the feedback : )



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