Who I am

"Who am I"? You may ask.

Or perhaps you don't 

Perhaps you don't care

Well I'm the quiet, shy, invisible girl at school.

The girl that haves social media just to make me feel good. To make me feel something which I still feel the Same nothing but a big dark hole in my heart. Empty, lost.

The girl that no one really sees. I never get guys attention. there always looking at me like I shouldn't be here. Maybe I shouldn't. May be if I was gone there be fine without me they wouldn't even care.

If you ask me I don't remember ever having anxiety or maybe I do perhaps I should get that check but the thing is I don't want a God damn label on me.

I'm the girl that sits in my room and cry. Listen to sad music thinking about my life. When I come out of the room I act like everything alright if you need me to play the a girl called BROKEN sign me up. 

All I want is for people to ask me if I'm ok and mean it.

I'm the girl that's such a coward to slit her wrist I mean I thought about sucide once or twice or what I'm I saying I thought about it a million times. one day I couldn't take so I grabed the knife but I thought twice and through it.

I'm the girl that feels ugly in her own home.

I'm the girl that deals with two growns up fighting day in and day out.

The thing is in 13 Who knows what it will be like when I'm 18

I'm the girl who dosen't have a dad 

So call me selfish, pathetic, or even a bitch 

I'm the girl that loves everyone but gets nothing in return.

The girl that haves demons in her mind the movie the ring ain't more scary than my depression pulling my back.

I used to think everything will get better I mean I tell my self that every day but nothing changes 

No one knows i know i said it a thousand tines but they act like they do I mean every day I ask God why me. Why can't I have a perfect life like my friend Olivia 

 I think I'm fat even when I look skinny.

My family dosen't even know what I think hafe of the time.

My house feels like a reality show. There is yelling and putting people down all the time.

When I was 2 I never knew my life was going to be like this.

You may tell me it's ok it will get better 

I know it will get better but when I been wandering this for almost 7 years 

I feel like I cried more than I was a baby.

So I'm the broken. Selfish. Label is anxiety and depression.a girl you can't change who I am I. Know life's not fair I just want to be loved is that so much to ask for God I'm not asking for much. Just love. Also...

I want a reason to live.